Yes. I made you a promise last time that I would finish that post and I didn't. Get off my back.
First off, I'd like to talk a little bit about Cumulus Discord. I met Alexander at a fundraiser in a little bistro and I'm pretty sure I started off the conversation talking about Hobbits because I got nervous like I usually do when I meet new people. This fellow is extremely charming. I'm not sure if I'd say he's as charming as Starbucks Man, but he definitely struck a chord with me. I went about being a creep and located his myspace through his facebook and thoroughly enjoyed his music for a second time. Now it's about time you did too. Cumulus Discord brings out the romantic in me. I can't quite say why but Catching Cotton and Freedom to Fall both make me want to get on a big boat and let a stranger paint me naked and drop my grandmother's necklace into the ocean. Not sure where those particular urges are coming from. Point is, go check him out and give him your love, and if you like his music go give some props to Skye Wallace and Bronwyn Malloy. These are some talented dub-cee(west coast for gangsters) artists that for sure deserve more love than they have right now.
Secondly, Matthew Gray Gubler's Halloween album? I think this one might have to stew a bit with me. It's not at all the I'm unprepared for a Halloween album or that it's Matthew(that actually makes it about ten times more awesome, as well as ten point six times more relevant) I think it's just that it's something new. We as humans don't seem to be too receptive to things that we don't know by heart as a general rule. He's done pretty well for himself, MGG, so I'm sure he'll get on just fine. I just thought I'd express my mild hesitance. Maybe it's just because he wasn't as impressed with my solar-powered laser grizzly as I was and I'm slightly but not overly bitter about it.
Sorry for a link overload tonight.
Lastly(I hope), I saw my carpet today. I'd forgotten that it was there purely because for the month I've been here, clothes have been strewn over the length of my apartment. I don't own a dresser and that's my best excuse. Anyway, in a frantic search for my birth certificate I did the unthinkable and cleaned. Now I see a carpet and for the first time I'm noticing the floor has a weird little peak and slant in it; the imperfection makes it all the more real. I didn't find my birth certificate. Char is going to be very mad at me. I need to come up with a good excuse in 5.5 hours before we head into town or she's going to rip my skin off like Pyramid Head.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
Things I've learned working in a clothing store and a few things I wish would come to be
So I've been working at a clothing store for three months now, I think, and I've learned some very interesting things as well as wished some other things. I'm very fond of lists right now so I'll make you another list, this one regarding things I've learned working in a clothing store and a few things I wish would come to be.
1. *I've learned that there are about thirty-seven different shades of pink alone. Not being a pink person myself, this is a bit of an uncomfortable realization for me. How many times have I accidentally worn mountbatten pink without realizing it? How many fandango shirts have I complimented in passing? And if there are thirty-seven shades of pink alone, how many shades of blue are there? How many shades of yellow? It's... terrifying, to be honest.
2. Smell has a lot to do with how much you sell. Not your smell, I mean, but the smell of the store. If people enjoy your store's smell they're more likely to stay longer and the longer they stay, the more crap they buy. It's pretty badass.
3. If your current wardrobe is shit, you'll spend your entire paycheck the moment you get it.
4. I wish it was acceptable for saleswomen to do the running man with customers in the store. I've never tried it but I feel guilty even when I do it when I'm alone. I don't think I could perform said old school dance with other human beings around without getting stage fright and throwing up into my hand but feeling really embarrassed about it, causing me to put said throw-up into my pocket. Don't even ask why I came to that conclusion because I have no answer for you and the pressure of not having an answer will invoke stage fright.
5. It's totally not spelled 'tye-dye'.
6. Knowing what a pashmina is and how to tie it is a pain in the ass but it's necessary.
I promise I'll finish this when I get home. I suck at doing things.
*amaranth, amaranth pink, brink pink, carmine pink, carnation pink, cerise, cerise pink, cherry blossom pink, coral pink, dark pink, deep carmine pink, deep pink, fandango, french rose, fuchsia, fuchsia pink, hollywood cerise, hot magenta, hot pink, lavender pink, light pink, light thulian pink, magenta, mountbatten pink, persian pink, persian rose, pink, puce, rose, rose pink, ruby, salmon pink, shocking pink, tea rose, thulian pink, ultra pink, variations of pink.
The thirty-seven shades of pink. I wasn't lying.
1. *I've learned that there are about thirty-seven different shades of pink alone. Not being a pink person myself, this is a bit of an uncomfortable realization for me. How many times have I accidentally worn mountbatten pink without realizing it? How many fandango shirts have I complimented in passing? And if there are thirty-seven shades of pink alone, how many shades of blue are there? How many shades of yellow? It's... terrifying, to be honest.
2. Smell has a lot to do with how much you sell. Not your smell, I mean, but the smell of the store. If people enjoy your store's smell they're more likely to stay longer and the longer they stay, the more crap they buy. It's pretty badass.
3. If your current wardrobe is shit, you'll spend your entire paycheck the moment you get it.
4. I wish it was acceptable for saleswomen to do the running man with customers in the store. I've never tried it but I feel guilty even when I do it when I'm alone. I don't think I could perform said old school dance with other human beings around without getting stage fright and throwing up into my hand but feeling really embarrassed about it, causing me to put said throw-up into my pocket. Don't even ask why I came to that conclusion because I have no answer for you and the pressure of not having an answer will invoke stage fright.
5. It's totally not spelled 'tye-dye'.
6. Knowing what a pashmina is and how to tie it is a pain in the ass but it's necessary.
I promise I'll finish this when I get home. I suck at doing things.
*amaranth, amaranth pink, brink pink, carmine pink, carnation pink, cerise, cerise pink, cherry blossom pink, coral pink, dark pink, deep carmine pink, deep pink, fandango, french rose, fuchsia, fuchsia pink, hollywood cerise, hot magenta, hot pink, lavender pink, light pink, light thulian pink, magenta, mountbatten pink, persian pink, persian rose, pink, puce, rose, rose pink, ruby, salmon pink, shocking pink, tea rose, thulian pink, ultra pink, variations of pink.
The thirty-seven shades of pink. I wasn't lying.
Monday, October 18, 2010
I really do wish I had a better excuse
Yeah, I disappeared for a while. I'm sorry but at the same time I'm not. I was getting settled in my new place and I just didn't have time for silly things like blogging. I'm here now though. Lord knows how long that'll keep up.
Since I have been gone so long, I decided I should have something to prove that I wasn't just being mean and neglectful and trying to keep you all(chortlechortle) on your toes. I have compiled a list of lessons I've learned during my first three weeks of living on my own as a proper adult. I know most lessons only stick if you learn them yourself but at least you'll have some idea of what to expect. If you already are an adult, feel free to sit back and laugh at my failures.
1. Watching Criminal Minds at 4:30 AM and then thinking you can actually cram two and a half hours of sleep in before work is completely ridiculous. First off, we both know that when you actually want to go to sleep you're never able to but when you're with friends and watching a movie you can fall asleep without a problem. Secondly, you just finished watching an episode about young girls being abducted and tortured. You live on your own with a cat that thinks more about his own balls than you. If someone breaks in, you are officially dead. There's no way in hell you'll be sleeping.
2. You can't fix your own toilet. I understand that you'd really like to be handy and smart, I really do, but the more you play with it the more you break it. This rule applies to most household things; sink, shower, toaster oven, that one loose tile you thought you could just glue.
3. You have to do your own laundry. A lot of you knew this already and that was on your to-do list. You have a hamper and laundry soap and a roll of quarters so you can go down to the laundromat and be an adult. That's all fine and dandy, but this also means you actually have to do it. Do not wait until flies gather around your overflowing hamper and you're forced to fashion a diaper-like structure out of an old toque to make up for the fact that you have no clean underwear.
4. Nobody's going to wake you up and tell you to go to work. If you don't have a great alarm, set some jogging pants next to your keys in the morning. You will be running to work.
5. Don't watch crime shows at full volume. Your neighbours worry when they hear girls screaming and crying in your apartment.
6. If Dad offers to buy you groceries, say yes or you'll be eating a different piece of your second-hand couch every night.
7. Don't get sick. Mom isn't there to make you chicken soup. You can only call in sick so many times. On a happier note, this means no more rectal thermometers. Or was that only in my family?
8. I realize you think you'll look like an idiot if you wear your helmet while riding your bike to work, but you'll look like even more of an idiot when you fall and hit your head because your motor skills suck.
9. The best lessons are ones you forget and have to relearn over and over.
Since I have been gone so long, I decided I should have something to prove that I wasn't just being mean and neglectful and trying to keep you all(chortlechortle) on your toes. I have compiled a list of lessons I've learned during my first three weeks of living on my own as a proper adult. I know most lessons only stick if you learn them yourself but at least you'll have some idea of what to expect. If you already are an adult, feel free to sit back and laugh at my failures.
1. Watching Criminal Minds at 4:30 AM and then thinking you can actually cram two and a half hours of sleep in before work is completely ridiculous. First off, we both know that when you actually want to go to sleep you're never able to but when you're with friends and watching a movie you can fall asleep without a problem. Secondly, you just finished watching an episode about young girls being abducted and tortured. You live on your own with a cat that thinks more about his own balls than you. If someone breaks in, you are officially dead. There's no way in hell you'll be sleeping.
2. You can't fix your own toilet. I understand that you'd really like to be handy and smart, I really do, but the more you play with it the more you break it. This rule applies to most household things; sink, shower, toaster oven, that one loose tile you thought you could just glue.
3. You have to do your own laundry. A lot of you knew this already and that was on your to-do list. You have a hamper and laundry soap and a roll of quarters so you can go down to the laundromat and be an adult. That's all fine and dandy, but this also means you actually have to do it. Do not wait until flies gather around your overflowing hamper and you're forced to fashion a diaper-like structure out of an old toque to make up for the fact that you have no clean underwear.
4. Nobody's going to wake you up and tell you to go to work. If you don't have a great alarm, set some jogging pants next to your keys in the morning. You will be running to work.
5. Don't watch crime shows at full volume. Your neighbours worry when they hear girls screaming and crying in your apartment.
6. If Dad offers to buy you groceries, say yes or you'll be eating a different piece of your second-hand couch every night.
7. Don't get sick. Mom isn't there to make you chicken soup. You can only call in sick so many times. On a happier note, this means no more rectal thermometers. Or was that only in my family?
8. I realize you think you'll look like an idiot if you wear your helmet while riding your bike to work, but you'll look like even more of an idiot when you fall and hit your head because your motor skills suck.
9. The best lessons are ones you forget and have to relearn over and over.
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